A long time ago, when the twin cities of Winston and Salem were mere villages, a certain Salem woman of loose moral character was convicted of witchcraft and hanged from the old oak tree that stood on the village green. The next morning, a passerby noticed a new knothole had formed on the trunk of the tree during the night. This knothole bore a striking resemblance to a woman's vagina and was located at a conveniently accessible height. A crowd soon gathered, and the consensus was that the spirit of the witch must have entered the tree upon her death.
The men of Salem were pleased by this turn of events, but the womenfolk were outraged. They stormed into the mayor's office and demanded that he have this evil tree cut down and removed from the village. The mayor, axe in hand, accompanied the womenfolk to the village green, picking up the sheriff and the preacher along the way. When they arrived at the tree, the mayor handed the axe to the sheriff and told him to chop it down. The sheriff hit the tree a mighty blow, which dislodged a dead branch that fell upon the sheriff, killing him. Filled with righteous indignation, the preacher then picked up the axe and landed another mighty blow on the tree, which dislodged another dead branch that fell upon the preacher, killing him. The womenfolk then confronted the mayor, insisting that he should cut down the tree himself. "Sorry ladies", the mayor replied, "But the sheriff and the preacher have clearly demonstrated that you can't take the Cunt Tree out of Salem."
No comments:
Post a Comment