The Better Man

I think that I now understand what Uncle Ken is getting at with his bum question. Let's forget about the bum and make a generic question out of it: If a Christian, a Buddhist, and a secular humanist all commit the same good deed, which one is the better man? answer: Another Christian will likely say that the Christian is the better man, another Buddhist will likely say that the Buddhist is the better man, and another secular humanist will likely say that the secular humanist is the better man. It's just like in school. If one of the cool kids wears a goofy hat, it's cool. If one of the nerds wears the same goofy hat, it's nerdy.

The hypothetical tree in Uncle Ken's hypothetical yard is different. Either the tree is there or it isn't, not much wiggle room there. But what if we question the relative value of the tree instead of it's existence? Uncle Ken's neighbor has a different tree in his yard, and he thinks his tree is better than Uncle Ken's tree. How do we resolve that one? Uncle Ken believes that his tree is better because it's bigger than his neighbor's tree, which is precisely why the neighbor believes his tree to be better because, in his opinion, a smaller tree is more suitable for the size of both of their yards. "But my tree is prettier than your tree", says Uncle Ken. "No it's not because it's out of proportion to your yard and your house", says the neighbor. "Proportion-shmortion!" says Uncle Ken , "Everyone knows that bigger is always better." They go on like this for years until, one day, both trees go down in windstorm. Uncle Ken's tree takes out the house and the garage, while the neighbor's tree just crushes some rose bushes. Now we can objectively say that Uncle Ken was wrong and his neighbor was right but, before this, it was just a matter of opinion.

Old Dog: I'm pretty happy with my ice cream as it is, but I just wanted to try that cornstarch thing to see if it makes it any better. So how much cornstarch do I put in it?

I'm surprised that you have trouble storing ice cream in the freezer. I put mine in those plastic freezer containers, the semi-disposable kind. I use half gallon containers because I already had some of those on hand. A six cup batch doesn't fill the container, but so what? I usually eat it in three or four days, but I have left it longer, maybe a week or two, with no ill effects. My hypothetical wife says that store bought ice cream will stay good for at least two weeks, maybe more, we've never had to keep it any longer than that.