Do people go hunting in rough empty country? Seems rude. It’s one
thing to mug a guy on the street, but another to come right into his home and do
it. What the hell is out there that they can’t find something like it close to
home?
Like those bear hunters. Those rich guys who fly out to Frozen
Palooka in one of those planes that land on water to meet the trusty Indian
guide who leads them to their sumptious lodge full of drink and gourmet food. I
find this part ok, though personally I would rather be in a smoky bar in the
city. But then they go out and look for bears. Well the Indian guide looks for
bears, he points them out when he sees them, puts his finger to his mouth, hands
the guy some super duper gun while taking the snifter of cognac from him, so the
guy can shoot the bear, and then what? He’s not going to fix up some bear stew
in the sticks, I don’t think it’s swank for rich babes to drape themselves in
bear fur. So I guess he has the bear stuffed, probably standing up with its
paws outstretched like it is about to attack, which I admit is cool, but we
probably already have more of them than we can use.
Are there any hunters that other hunters think are assholes? How
about fishermen, is there are rivalry between the two?
I guess the fisherman that goes out in one of those fancy boats and
is tied into one of those sturdy lounge chairs and has the lackey bring him his
brewskis, and I assume just pisses in his pants because it’s all ocean anyway, I
guess he is like the guy in the lodge up north, who has taken his trophy wife
along with him, just to tempt the single guys to knock him off accidently on
purpose so that they can comfort the grieving widow, so that there will be some
element of risk to the trip.
Well I get carried away don’t I? Well I guess I gave an exposition
of tvs and smartphones in smoky bars, so I shouldn’t complain about your
exposition of elctronic doodads in the great outdoors.
Of course they aren’t smoky anymore, and I guess that’s good. I
was smoking in the bar when they first kicked us out and I was a little pissed,
but later I enjoyed hanging with the cool kids outside the door puffing on our
cigs on the busy streets and looking devil may care. I have since cut way back
on the cigs and don’t smoke at all when I am at the bar, and I miss hanging with
the cool guys.
TV hunting and fishing shows? Really? Well I suppose a hunting
show might be alright if they tart it up like they used to do with those wild
kingdom shows where they kind of make up this story where in the end Cheri the
Cheetah finds her lost kittens, or are they pups?
But a fishing show. I suppose if they are all lined up at the bar
getting drunk and telling lies it might be a little interesting. But if they
are just sitting on the boat wondering what fly to tie on the line or checking
their sonar device, kill me now.
I used to think golf was the most boring thing on tv, but then one
night I saw Nascar, which is like driving on the expressway listening to
hillbillies, and even the thought of imminent death is not enough to keep my
eyes open. But tv fishing would likely give it a run for the money. How about
tv fishing with the stars?
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