How long have I had a smartphone now? I am inclined to say five years, but I have noticed that whenever I say something happened five years ago, it turns out to be ten. So let's say ten.
Well of course I have reached the age where I pretty much don't like anything new. TV's were new when we were kids. Sometimes in the rare occasions when I am among young people, in order to get a little attention from them, to get them to raise their pimply faces from their phones, I will say "You know I remember back to when almost nobody had a television," It never works though because kids are never interested in anything old folks have to say, and I know that because I was once a kid.
But it was different when we were kids, old folks then were stodgy. We are not like that, we are hip and with it. We aren't the old old folks of yesterday, we are the new old folks of today.
New, it was the buzzword of advertising back in the day. Every product we saw in commercials on our new TVs, was New. New and Improved, New and improved and containing IMP! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pOhfGezdcXU
I didn't like the new smartphones. Who wants to be available to callers even when they are out having some kind of exciting adventure? Phone calls were no longer the exciting events of my childhood, they were mostly annoying, some boring task, some long-winded boring pal, nothing that couldn't be taken care of when I got home. Who needed them? At first you get a little credit for hanging back from the latest trend, like a amiable eccentric, oh that Ken.
But after awhile that credit dissipates. You are supposed to meet somebody somewhere like an airport and they say, once you get there they will call you and tell you where to go next, and you say I don't have a cellphone. and they are Well fer Chrissake, and you are no longer amiable, you are annoying.
Like calling somebody and it just rings and rings and you are waiting for the machine to come on so that you can leave your message, but at some point you realize the machine is never coming on because they don't have one. So now, instead of leaving your message and being about your merry way, you have to remember to call them later and hope they are home, and if they are not you will have to call them again and so on and so on. What a pain in the ass. Why doesn't this jerk get with it?
In Chicago there is a Pizzeria Uno and a Pizzeria Duo just about a block from each other. One afternoon I was supposed to meet my sister at Uno, but she never showed up, what the hell?
Later I learned that it was supposed to be Duo. When time had passed and no Ken, she thought maybe I was at Uno. She had her smartphone with her so she called there and asked if there was anybody there that looked like Santa Claus wearing a Cub jacket, and they said no. Well you know those people, they don't give a fuck.
The next day I went out and bought a smartphone. More on that later.
No comments:
Post a Comment